If you’ve been in the studio for a shoot, you know how important words of encouragement are to the entire process. From the minute you book a date with UNVEILED, I’m in your inbox because I know how hard it can be to do something like that for yourself.
I know the power that words can have.
You’ve likely been telling yourself that you’re not worth it, or you’re too this or that, for years and let me tell you, those words ARE powerful.
I’m sure you’ve heard a lot about self-image. In our world, it’s pretty much impossible to look any direction without seeing some kind of body-related ad or trailer or something. It’s hard to focus on yourself when everything around you is telling you to be one way or another, to adopt some new habit, eat certain foods, wear specific clothes–anything and everything except to just be yourself.
That’s what I want to change.
I’m tired of women feeling like they need to answer to the world. We are all so uniquely beautiful, and if you’ve never heard that, let me tell you now:
You. Are. Beautiful.
YOU are worthy.
YOU are important.
YOU are not too much.
YOU are everything!
My studio is about body positivity, self-empowerment, and self-love.
When you’re there, I wanna be your biggest cheerleader because I know sometimes you’re not getting that at home, either from yourself or your partner. I know how hard it can be to encourage yourself and pump yourself up. But changing just a few small things in your self-talk can set you on a path to feeling confident and completely yourself every day. That doesn’t mean you need to change; you’re perfect the way you are, girl. But I want you to feel that.
It’s a pretty incredible thing to look in the mirror and think, “Wow, I am beautiful.” If that seems like something you could never, ever do, I’d like to encourage you to read some of my tips below to shift your inner monologue from a hater to a cheerleader.
1. Listen to what you’re thinking.
Creating awareness of the thoughts we’re having is the first step because it allows us to see our thoughts as what they are – thoughts. Thoughts come and go. They pass through. Your thoughts are not your reality. They are thoughts. And they can be reshaped.
The best way I’ve found to become more aware of my own thoughts is to do so through deep breathing. When you feel like you’re caught up in tailspin of negative thinking, come back to your breath. Close your eyes, place your hand on your heart, and take a few slow, deep breaths.
Acknowledge the thoughts you’re having, and remind yourself that a thought is not reality. It is a thought. Thoughts are a product of your mind. You are not your thoughts. And you can shift your perspective, and your thoughts, by becoming aware of what you’re thinking.
2. Guide your inner voice.
Guess who’s in control here? You are. You get to decide if you tear yourself apart or if you build yourself up. It’s a decision you can consciously make. It isn’t easy, especially at first, but it is absolutely worth it.
Here’s an exercise we do at the studio when our clients get stuck in negative self-talk. Pretend the woman looking back at you in the mirror is your best friend (or daughter, mother, etc.).
I call this flipping the script.
Would you tell her she’s ugly?
No, you’d point out what makes her beautiful.
Would you tell her to give up?
No, you’d encourage her to keep going.
Would you tell her she’s worthless?
No, you’d list all the things she deserves.
You are the voice you hear more than any other voice in the world. Make sure she’s speaking kindly to herself. Next time you find yourself in a whirlwind of negative self-talk (we all have days like that), try flipping the script in your head to celebrate the things you love about yourself and the wonderful things you are doing. It will take practice, but I believe in you!
3. Schedule yourself in.
“Me” time isn’t going to just magically happen. You have to make yourself a priority. To set yourself up for success, you have to plan it and keep your commitment to yourself.
It’s easy to slink down into hating on yourself when you feel defeated and overwhelmed. Busy home lives, children and partners that need you for everything, work schedules that just won’t calm down. I get it. But if your emotional tank is empty, you’ve got nothing left to gas yourself back up.
Scheduling time for yourself to work on yourself will set you up to accomplish your goals and create an appreciation, not only for your time, but for the things you bring to the world. You’ll find your balance. You’ll build your confidence. And by taking care of yourself first, but you’ll be better equipped to care for others (which so many of us do).
Start with an hour. You know that hour you gave yourself by getting up early? That one. Slip out of bed for some time with yourself. You’ll get addicted. You’ll hold these moments sacred. And you’ll start moving through your days with a sense of self and accomplishment that starts to squash the Debbie Downer that comes around when things feel out of wack.
A few small changes a day can completely change your inner monologue, which can in turn change your whole perspective on life.
What do you have to lose? Sometimes, it takes asking ourselves that question to move forward in life. If you feel stuck, lost, listless, confused, or just plain sad, try adding in a few of my tips every day. The results may surprise you, girl.
Let me know how it goes. And if you need anything in the meantime, my door (or DMs) is always open. Be YOUR best self, period. No one else’s version. You’ve got this, babe. 💗